Tuesday, October 2, 2012

October and Capture Your Grief Day 2

I feel like I may be the lone member of the baby loss community to be happy about it being October.  It's another one of those bittersweet months.  Coen was born in October, so it is a good month for us.  But, it is also Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month.  I find that Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness is easier for me to stomach than Adelyn's birthday.  To me it is more celebrating our babies' memories/lives, a positive experience - vs. September which for me is all about the choices I made and ultimately the death of my much wanted baby girl.

I know things have been a bit negative in my blog land, but honestly the past week was one of the toughest I've had in a long time.  Someone mentioned the Carly Marie Capture Your Grief project to me - I had read about it, but I've been so busy and tired that I hadn't looked into it.  I decided maybe it was time for a change around here, so I looked into it.  You can read about it here: Capture Your Grief.

Day 1 was out - the sunrise on the first day of October.  I'm lucky I get to work on time, let alone have time to take a photo in the morning.  But the rest of the project looks like something I would really like.  I may not have a photo to post for each day, but I certainly can write something about each topic.

So, here goes:
Day 2. Before Loss Self Portrait

I searched through lots of pictures from 2010, but this one stuck out as really capturing the "old me."  Interesting that it is me holding two little girls.....and that Sierra is almost 2 here so I am guessing this is what Adelyn would look like right now.  This was the day we told our family that I was pregnant with Adelyn.


KnottedFingers said...

Beautiful photo sweetie!! Thank you for sharing. I too like October. I was married on Halloween and I love Halloween <3

KrystalK said...

I love that picture of you <3
I dont like October whatsoever. This is the month Stella died, so it just makes that much harder on me. I remember being pregnant with stella and someone posted something about October 15th being Pg and infant loss awareness day, I hesitated to "like it" and just 2 weeks after I "joined" for the wave of light, I joined more than I couldve imagined I would. It makes me so sick even thinking about it. Fall even kills me like that. My pregnancy photos were taken in the leaves and with pumpkins, i wanted so badly to love the fall and now it just makes me FALL. It remeinds me of death and the end. Im not sure ill ever get over it. Im honestly to the point I would MOVE to a place where Fall does not exist.

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