Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Frustrated

This is a common feeling for me lately. Everything seems to leave me frustated. Potty training, work, the weather, never ending housework.....

Tonight I'm feeling frustrated because I am SO SICK of hearing about someone else having a baby girl. Why does it seem like everyone keeps having girls? Usually it seems like it goes in spurts. Well everyone I know, except for maybe 2 people, has had girls since September. I thought the trend was changing to boys - I know of 4 people having boys between now and August. And then September.....and it's back to LOADS of girls already. That was MY month to have my girl. What it comes down to is I just want Adelyn. And I know I can't have her. So if I can't have her, I'd like to have another little girl for Sierra to grow up with, to wear matching dresses with her like I dreamed, to be her Maid of Honor when she gets married, to gossip on the phone for hours with. I could go on and on. But I feel this overwhelming longing for another daughter, so every time I hear about someone else having one, my heart sinks, breaks, just hurts. I want to know when that is going to go away? I hate this feeling. I want to be happy for them, to tell them how awesome little girls are. To be able to just be thankful that I have one living, breathing, beautiful daughter. But right now I just can't. And I'm very impatient about it.

1 comments:

Amy von Oven said...

I understand...I feel SO bad, my own sister just had her first little girl and I can't even be happy for her because I am jealous. I know its wrong and I will work through it, but it is REALLY hard sometimes. I really just want MY girl back...I am sorry...I know it can be really hard.

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